12 May 2013

potty talk

we were riding around with all of the windows down. the boys were shouting over the wind. it was 4 against 1. like most times. i was laughing so hard it was difficult for them to distinguish if i was feigning approval or disapproval. but there i was-in a conversation defending myself. 

i called back to them through the sounds of air and radio, "it's more polite to say, 'i need to go to the men's room than to say, 'i need to go take a whiz'." 

then i stopped and had one of those out of body-looking-down-at-myself-moments. who have i become? did i really just say that? for a split second i thought, "if he continues saying such nonsense, it will be an eternity before he has a girl interested in him. it made me almost want to say, "keep it up, buddy."

then another voice chimed in, "why do people say, 'i need to use the john'?" i don't know. 

a truck load of port-a-potties drove by eliciting much snickering. even more curious speculation ensued.

"how about, 'i need to take a leak'?" who has raised you, boy? where have you heard such a thing? and i wondered to myself. 

if you had told me that someday i would be driving around with 4 little boys explaining proper bathroom vernacular, i would not have believed you. not for one second. but here i am. and that is what motherhood is. 

being in a place you never thought. saying things you never thought. 

it's harder than you thought. {c}ruder than you thought. more real than you would ever wish. and more rewarding than you could possibly imagine, hope or dream.

so here's to all you mothers. the ones with children and the ones whose children are yet to be realized. the mothers who have raised their own. the mothers who have raised another's. the friends who have loved like mothers. the mothers who are still waiting. 

keep shouting loving reminders. keep laughing so hard you can hardly speak. keep surprising yourself. and like i say to my closest mommy friends, keep it classy-potty mouth and all.


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